Spain's café of Love!
by chibi-starz
Summary: Spain and Romano decide to open a café, inviting everyone and some are actually interested to come, especially America...unfortunately the date has an unexpected turn when they meet some acquaintance...Rochu and UsUK.
1. Chapter 1

**Spain's café of Love**

_**Story info:**_

_**Pairings: Rochu and UsUk are the main pairing.**_

_**There is also Spain/Romano (for now... more to come).**_

_**Warnings: cursing (mainly because of Romano lol XD), crack somehow, randomness and sometimes illogical stuff. **_

_**-Words in Italic means that it's a thought.**_

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><p><em><strong>Chapter 1<strong>_

It was a pretty normal day at the world conference. After 20 minutes of "important" discussions and debates, all nations deserved a break. America was talking while eating his hamburger just like usual. England was tired of arguing with both Alfred and Francis. Italy was making pastaé Germany was face palming and Latvia fainted for the 10th time in 20 minutes. A typical conference really…

But this time, something a little different happened today…

"Excuse me everyone!" Spain said overly happy. "I have an important announcement to say!"

Everyone stopped what they were doing and looked at the Spaniard, who was standing on the conference room's table trying to gain everyone's intention. Next to him was Romano who seemed shy and tried to avoid looking at the others.

"Romano and I have made an important decision and we would appreciate if everyone could support us…" Spain didn't even finish his sentence when suddenly all the room applauded.

"Finally, you're getting married!"

"Congratulations! It's about time!"

"Will there be free food?"

"And pasta?"

"I'm so totally like gonna catch, like, the bouquet!"

"Bouquet and Marriage originated from Korea Da-ze!"

Everyone in the room was talking among themselves about everything and anything, not paying attention to the Spaniard anymore. Antonio stayed there trying to get everyone's attention back hopelessly, while next to him Romano was red like a tomato.

"Shut up! Like hell I'm going to marry that Bastard! You people are f-ed in your mind if you think so!" The Italian shouted.

There was a huge silence and everyone looked at Spain hoping to have a confirmation of the later statement.

"Yes, its true…We just wanted to tell that we opened a café, and you are all invited to come." Spain paused hearing the large crowd saying a disappointed "awww"

"…although, I have to admit that I am flatter by the encouragements..."The Spaniard said, half-shyly with a blush on his face while giving a little smile to Romano.

"You are messed up in your f-ing mind." Lovino shouted still blushing and turning his head away to avoid the other.

Since nothing was interesting anymore the people just walked away, continuing their break.

"Hey, wait!" Spain screamed."The point was that since we are opening today, we got coupons for everyone and we would really appreciate if you would come." He added, quickly distributing the coupons to every random person that passed.

The US of A was actually passing by here, rushing himself to go to the bathroom before the end of the break, when he received one.

"You will visit us right, America?" Spain asked kindly to him. Alfred took the coupon and looked at it.

"_Welcome to Spain's café for lovers; the café made specially to make your precious one and you have the greatest luck in relationship ever!_" America read it aloud.

"Yeah, it's a bit cheesy…and this doesn't actually make sense…but the manager said that it was for marketing, so we hope it works… So are you going to visit us?" He inquired with a sheepish smile.

However, America was still fixing the coupon he had in his hand.

"America?"

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><p>"Come on Iggy! It's gonna be fun!" America screamed in hope to convince the British man, pulling him as hard as he could. But it didn't work, because the said Brit tried to get out of the grip.<p>

"For the Last time NO!I already have a dinner prepared at home!"

"But your dinner sucks!"The American exclaimed with a frown.

"No it doesn't!" Arthur snorted, irritated by such insults. "And it's better than your hamburgers!" he quickly added.

After this endless day, he was really hungry and he longed to return home to eat peacefully and in calm. Unfortunately, it would be very difficult to be in peace with the company of the American who still didn't want to give up.

Arthur pushed away Alfred and walked away from him. He was surprised to see that the other one didn't follow him, but he wasn't complaining…

"But we won't eat hamburgers!"America suddenly said. Arthur stopped walking and turned slowly with a surprised expression on his face.

"What? What did you say?"

American wasn't planning on eating hamburgers? What in the world was going on?

Anyway, Alfred was really content that he managed to surprise the British. He took the coupon and showed to the other blond proudly.

"Look, its Spain's café! He is going to open it today. Weren't you listening earlier at the conference?"

"I don't remember …" England muttered, taking the coupon to examine it quickly.

Sometimes Arthur wouldn't pay attention to the things that happened at the conference. Mainly because after the first 30 minutes, there were so much stupid and crazy stuff going on that his brain couldn't survive. Just today, he had a headache after the first 10 minutes.

"HAHA you weren't listening!"The American said all happy poking England on his shoulder.

"I'm going home!" England turned walking away. He was so annoyed by the other one that he threw the paper in the air.

"NO!Please look at this, it seems so good right? We should go!" America quickly took the paper.

"Is this another pretext to pay for your dinner, Idiot?" England replied bitterly.

"NO!I really want to go with you! Come on, it will change from your inedible scones."

Alfred thought he was about to persuade the Englishman; but in reality he wasn't. Arthur was even more offended and anger, however, the American was too much oblivious to notice it.

"Come on! Why don't you want to come?"

"Hmm, I don't really like Spanish food." Arthur lied exasperated. Now, he was just tired of this conversation. He just wanted to go home and any excuses would work at this point, if only America would understand.

"Come on, It will be fun! Just us two nobody else will be there, the café just open! Our relationship will be kept a secret. I promise!"

"That's not the raison Idiot!"

The café seemed so nice and calm anyway from the outside. Even though it seemed really charming, Arthur was sure that he wouldn't think the same for the inside.

From far away he could hear screams and yelling coming from the inside.

"What the bloody hell is happening in there?" Arthur asked disbelieved, walking to the café more hesitantly than he was before. Just like usual, Alfred didn't notice anything and just continued to whistling happily the national American anthem.

_Why is this idiot so happy for…?_ Ever since England "agreed" to go with him, the American was even in a greater mood. England could swear that if something bad happened today, he would blame America and curse him.

"Look Iggy it seems so nice!" the American said opening the door, revealing an indeed nice café, but still noisy.

"I really got a bad feeling about it…" Arthur muttered. The worst thing is that he couldn't hear or see Minty anymore. "That is a bad sign, this room is cursed."

"Iggy, stop being paranoid, nothing bad will happen" America said putting his arm around the other's shoulder.

"Hey! A table for two, please!" America said loudly to the waiter, who was none other than Romano.

"Stop screaming! I'm not deaf you bastard!" Romano said irritated. "You can sit there and wait for a while, until we get a place for you two." he instructed.

Alfred and Arthur looked behind the Italian to see that the café was completely empty. There were many available tables, they just weren't completely prepared. Why would they have to wait?

Both of them stared blankly at the Italian. "Why do we have to wait, there's no one else in this café?"

"Just shut up and wait! You two don't have any right to tell me how to do my job!" Romano replied angrily.

"Ok, Ok we'll wait, bloody git!" Arthur said, not wanting to argue. This really didn't help his headache. He just wanted to finish with this day...

In the other side, Romano said some cursing words and went to the kitchen.

"You see it seems lovely!" Alfred said, seemingly not realising the rudeness of their waiter.

"You are stupid! And get your arm off of me!" He said pushing away the other's arm.

"That's okay Iggy nobody is here! If someone comes I'll just take it off. I promise!" America said heroically putting his arm back around the other's shoulder.

Alfred always thought that the way Arthur was embarrassed with such things was funny.

"Arghh, I really have a bad feeling about it…" England said suddenly shivering.

"Hey, what's the worst that could happen?" America exclaimed, still having his happy go lucky smile.

"Don't you feel a weird aura suddenly?"

"A What?" Alfred asked with a blank stare.

"Aiyaaaa! Put me down aru!"

"Yao-Yao stop being shy or I'll have to use force, kolkolkol~."

Arthur and Alfred fidgeted when they heard the familiar voices…They turned slowly to see that, indeed, it was the two persons they thought it was…

"Oh, no!" The two screamed at the same time.

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><p><em><strong>This was an idea that sort of motivates me, because it seemed like something really funny to write. Probably because, I really like both Rochu and UsUk. <strong>_

_**Review please~**_


	2. Chapter 2

_**It's been a long time that I neglected this fanfic, so I decided to contribute more from now on, however I can't assure how often I can post new chapters. **_

_**By the way, I thought that Spain's café should be in Spain, because it don't really see the point of Spain having a café in some other country xD. So all this happens in Spain and so was the world conference of the previous chapter.**_

_**Since it's been a long time, this chapter is longer. Hope you will enjoy =) **_

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><p><em><strong>Chapter 2<strong>_

China was walking peacefully. It was a wonderful day of spring and the weather was so nice.

It was a perfect little activity to relax and forget about the endless meeting he just finished, before taking the plane to go back home.

He had to admit that Spain had a nice country and the scenery was absolutely beautiful.

However, soon something disturbed his quiet little walk. Yao couldn't help but have the feeling that someone was following him…

He quickly turned around, but saw no one. Why did he always have that bad feeling?

The Chinese nation decided to continue… but once again, he was sure to hear footsteps following closely behind.

"Russia, stop following me, aru!" He screamed, turning around quickly. He was thankful that no one was nearby, because he would have looked like an insane person screaming at "no one".

After a moment of silence, a tall Russian hastily appeared from behind a trashcan.

"Aww, how did Yao-Yao knew I was here da?" The blond asked with his ever sweet smile.

"You follow me every time, aru."Yao muttered.

"Where is Yao-Yao going?"

"Home. Where else aru?" The Asian answered, not really understanding the question. It was more than logical that after the world conferences, everyone was too much tired to do anything except going home.

"Aren't you going to eat, da?"

"Yes. I'm going to eat when I'll be home aru."

And there was another silence between the two.

"Can we eat together?" Russia bluntly asked, noticing that neither of the two spoke for a short time.

Yao thought for a moment. Each time Ivan came to eat, he never wanted to leave. China always ended up losing precious time trying to get Ivan out of his home… and sometimes the Russian _didn't_ go home.

China couldn't afford to go with whatever Ivan was planning, not tonight! He needed to sleep and rest well this night, because tomorrow he would have to wake up early and full of energy for the big 50% sales off of everything related to Kitty-chan.

_Quick! Find an excuse! Anything aru!_ The Chinese panicked mentally.

"Well I'm just having yesterday's leftovers and there isn't so much to share aru…"

"No. Not at your house, da?" Russia chuckled. After noticing that China was giving him the blank stare of confusion, the northern nation decided to explain.

"Here, da?"

The Asian was still confused, so Ivan showed him a paper.

"A café, aru?" Yao asked, looking at the coupon. He wasn't sure of what was the other man's point.

"Yes, looks fun, let's go."

"But I already have—"

China couldn't even finish his sentence, because he was quickly taken over Russia's shoulder.

"Aiyaa! Put me down aru!"

"Nyet~ I want to enjoy a nice time at the café with Yao-Yao~" Ivan said with a childlike tone.

"Aiyaa, I'm going to miss my plane aru. I can't afford to miss it. It's important aru!"

"The café is pretty close it won't take much time, da?" The blond reassured, ignoring Yao's protests.

"But you aren't forced to bring me aru! You can go alone! "China responded tiredly.

"I do. I only want to go if you also come, da!"

And, for that reason, China was forced to visit Spain's café with Russia.

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><p>Since the first second Russia and China entered the café, there was a deep silence…<p>

Unlike how America promised a while ago, with keeping the relationship between him and England secret, he did otherwise. From the second he saw the two other he rapidly pulled his Arthur closer to him… and the British didn't really appreciate the gesture.

"Leave me alone!"

"England is mine! _We_ are better than you two!" Alfred shouted, pointing at the Russian who was holding the agitated China over his shoulder with an arm.

"What are you talking about, you idiot?" England snapped, blushing in so many shades of red.

"Yao-Yao is mine and _our_ relationship is the one who is better, da?" Ivan said with his happy smile, despite that, there was a sudden dark atmosphere. He really disliked how Alfred always pretended to be better than everyone.

"What are you talking about! You just kidnapped me to come eat with you by force, aru! " China protested angrily.

"Yao-Yao is just so much shy."

"Put me down, aru!"

"Only if you promise me, you will not escape da?" Ivan proposed.

Yao was about to scold at the north nation, but he then realised that he was the center of attention of the two others. Not only he didn't like the attention, but also he was embarrassed by being held by a much younger nation.

"Yes…" He whispered very silently, thankfully this was enough for the Russian to put him down.

While Yao was arranging his clothes from plies, there was another absolute silence, but this one was rather very really awkward and cold…

Russia and America were glaring deathly at each others, while England pretended to ignore all this. Arthur really had a bad feeling about the current situation…

_Ignore the atmosphere England, maybe if you change the subject, you will get out of this place mentally and physically sane…_

"The bloody waiter takes time, right?" He said, ringing the small bell that was on the counter. He was hoping to change the conversation.

"YOU COMMIES ARE LAME!" America yelled, pointing the Russian in a really childishly manner.

"Thanks Alfred…." England sarcastically muttered. So much for his perfect plan, now he definitely wouldn't get out of this place with his sanity.

"No, _you_ are the one who is lame da?"

Arthur continued ringing the bell, hoping that the waiter would come quickly before another "wannabe" cold war would happen.

"Takes one to know one!" America continued the argument.

Arthur rang the bell twice quicker.

"Exactly da? You are the one who said it first."

And the British continued to ring faster; his hand was starting to hurt.

"…wait… what?" America questioned, confused with the argument. He couldn't remember who said what. But before their serious debate could continue, some really un-happy Italian came.

"Stop with this damn thing!" Romano screamed, surprising everyone and taking the bell harshly away from England.

"Are you stupid or what? It's not by ringing it that I will come faster, Idiot!"

"Hey! Who are you calling Idiot? You're the git!" England responded back, feeling insulted.

"Wow, Iggy calm down…" Alfred said gently, holding back the British. "Don't want to start a dispute on the first day of Spain's café. It would be sad for poor Spain."

"Yeah, that's not very kind aru…" China pointed out.

"At least, wait after we are served da?"

"What?" England couldn't believe this. They were the ones who were fighting and he was the one who has been blamed.

Arthur was now mentally preparing the list of people he would curse, and America wasn't the only one on the list now.

"Anyway, since you are here, can we have a table for two?" Yao asked, before Romano could leave.

"Well there is only one table ready yet and it's a table for six. So will you all be sharing a table?" He inquired while taking notes.

"NO!" The four all screamed at the same time.

"We are taking a table separately."England explained hoping to be clear, but apparently the American didn't find it clear enough.

"Separately? No! We are together Iggy, remember?" Alfred pointed out, afraid to be forgotten.

"And Yao and I are together da?" The Russian mentioned.

"That's not what I meant! "Arthur tried to explain, he was really starting to lose his patience.

Romano didn't understand anything of what was going on; it was difficult when all the four didn't stop protesting at everything and were talking at the same time.

"So are you going to take a table for six or not?" He demanded again with a blunt tone of impatience.

"No!"The four screamed at the same time again.

"We want to be together." America said again referring to him and England, but this just confused even more the Italian.

"But you bastards just said no!"

"That's not what we meant aru…"

"Can we just take the table, da?" Ivan asked, everyone was starting to get annoyed by this conversation and he wasn't exception.

"No, you can't. We were here first commies! It's our table!" Alfred protested.

"I don't see you two there, so it's not yours da?"

There was yet another moment of silence and both America and Russia looked at the table.

In less than a second, both of them ran to the table like if their lives would depend on it, hoping to be the firsts. It looked like two kids fighting immaturely for something stupid.

"Come on guys, there are many tables aru. You two are exaggerating…" China said tired of the situation.

"Will you people decide? I don't have all day you know!"Romano shouted, not bothering to keep being at least a little polite anymore.

"Yes, we will take the table, just Iggy and me." The American said sitting on a chair.

"That's not fair Da?" Russia replied angrily. "kolkolkol!"

"Haaaa!" Both Romano and England screamed of fear, backing away from the Russian.

"I'm tired of this! Resolve your problems between yourselves!" The Italian finally snapped, throwing his notepad and pen on the floor. He quickly ran away from them, cursing in many different rude expressions.

" Aiyaa, Ivan. It's okay aru. We are going to take another table." Yao said, pulling the northern nation by the arm.

"Okay…" Russia was not really happy, but he calmed a little and decided to follow China.

The Chinese nation quickly pulled the other man to a table that wasn't completely prepared yet. He didn't want Ivan to notice the expression of complete victory on the Alfred's face. That would have just caused even more disputes.

However just before they could arrive, there was a frying pan flying through the air and smashing right into the wall fiercely. All their attentions rapidly went to an albino with silver hair who was running away.

"Get out of my way people!" He screamed, panicking and pushing them form his way..

All the four looked confusedly at the other side of the room wondering what in the world Prussia was running away from. Right before they could start to wonder, a very irritated Hungary came out of the kitchen with another frying pan.

"OMG! It's the frying pan woman!" Alfred shouted.

All the four unconsciously ducked under the table. Thanks to all the world conferences they had, they were used to these kinds of events.

"Stay away Woman!" Prussia waved a fork toward her while shaking, he tried to remain as calm as he could.

"Not until you apologize!"

"Never! I'm too awesome to apologize" He protested.

At this moment, he ducked quickly before receiving a frying pan on the face. The pan harshly destroyed the table and Prussia was happy to have _awesome_ reflexes.

"Guys! Guys stop fighting! Hungary, drop the frying pan, please…" Spain said trying to calm the two before they would destroy the café.

"He started." Hungary pointed the albinos.

"No! She started."Prussia pointed the brunette.

"He said that woman doesn't know how to cook and ordered me to clean the dishes."She grumbled, giving the other the death glare.

"Prussia…" Antonio was somehow disappointed at his friend.

"I never said that! I said _she_ can't cook. Women know how to cook; _she_ doesn't." Gilbert defended himself. Hungary was about to punch the other man, but she was stopped by the Spaniard.

"Gilbert, will you stop, please!"

"Well she was cooking; she's the one who started!"

While the three continued to talk, the four allies happened to still be hidden under the table, waiting for the safe moment to come out.

"Is it safe to get out aru?" Yao inquired, noticing that there weren't any more fights and screams.

"That's okay the hero will save the day."Alfred said, taking the opportunity to show how such great hero he really was.

"Dudes! Stop fighting!" The American seriously exclaimed with a heroic pose.

"We already stopped…" Both Prussia and Hungary remarked; Alfred was late of some seconds actually.

"Idiot."Arthur snorted.

Since the dispute ended the three other allies got out of under the table. Yao was more than shocked to see that Hungary and Prussia had caused more damage than he thought. Not only the table that was almost completely prepared was destroyed, but the other tables' chairs and cups were also broken.

"Aiyaa! What are we going to do aru?" The Chinese said exasperated.

"Well, I suppose that you could ask England and America to share the table, since it's enough big for six."Spain proposed with a sheepish smile.

"W-wait… you don't understand. You see, we see each other almost every week. We are kind of tired to see each other's face already, aru."

"Yeah…that's pretty much the situation."The three others nodded.

"Ha, it's okay, I'll prepare another table. It will take…10 to 20 minutes."

"Aiyaa! But I'm going to miss my plane aru."The Asian gasped.

"I'm really sorry, but I really can't make it faster. You saw the people who are helping me, right?"

Yao let a big sigh; all this was so complicated for just a drink and a bakery. China was starting to wonder why Russia absolutely wanted them to come here for. However, he couldn't yell at Spain or Russia, it wasn't their fault.

"Can you share the table with us da?" Ivan asked the two others. He didn't want his little sunflower to miss his plane, but he also didn't want Yao to give up on passing time with him.

"…"

The Englishman really didn't know what to say. It wouldn't hurt sharing, but the way the Russian asked seemed more like an order than a question and England really didn't feel like sharing the place with such impolite (and scary) people.

"NO!" Alfred screamed childishly.

"I knew it aru…." Yao muttered.

"That's not very kind da? Kolkolkolkolkolkol~"

"Don't fight, please! I'll prepare another table for you. I'll finish as soon as I can." Antonio calmly responded.

"It's okay, we will wait aru."The Chinese said, bringing a smile to the Russian.

"Yey, Yao-Yao wants to eat with me da?"

"As long as I'm here, I should eat something aru." Yao admitted.

The two of them decided to wait and England couldn't help but to feel observed by the other couple. Especially because of the cold glare Russia was still giving him and America. If a random object would fall on his head, he would know who would be responsible for it.

"Alright! Alright! We can share the bloody table! I think there is enough place for everyone!"Arthur snapped irritated.

"What?" All the others said looking surprised at him.

_Shut up England! You are going to regret it…_

"I mean, it's just a bloody café, we aren't really going to stay for a long time anyway…" He explained a little calmer.

"Iggy?"

"Ha, so that's nice!" Spain said with a comforted expression. "A waitress will come to take your orders." He quickly added while giving them the menus, before running toward the kitchen.

"Thank you aru." China said half-heartily to the British.

"Thanks da?"

Even if Russia and China weren't convinced at first by the sudden kindness of England, they didn't hesitate to sit down.

"I'm just doing this because it would be annoying to hear you two complain all this time…" The Englishman said, avoiding looking at the two others. He always felt uncomfortable when he had to help the others and to express his feelings. At least, no one could be certain of his real intentions.

"Aww Iggy you are very kind."Alfred said surrounding Arthur with his arm. England only wanted to face palm himself.

"Well I guess it's a pretty huge table after all. It's not a big deal, right dudes?"America said with a big friendly smile, totally contradicting the comportment he had earlier.

Everyone glared at him, but he was too much busy looking at the menu to notice it.

Arthur sighed and also took a menu. Things were getting bad at every second; he couldn't wait to be out of this place. He comforted himself by reminding him that it was just a café and as soon as everyone ordered a tea or a little pastry, he could get the hell out of here.

"Okay, let's see what there is…"The American said, opening eagerly the menu, it was soon followed by a somehow non manly squeal. "OMG! They makes hamburgers!"He screamed of excitement.

"It has so many things da? I don't know what I'm going to chose."

"Aiyaa Have you seen this? The food seems more delicious than a restaurant aru"

_Oh no…_

Now England really wanted to knock his head on the table.

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><p><em><strong>This chapter was quite frustrating to write, mostly because the characters are most of the time angryannoyed and/or irritated. I swear it's not going to be like this for the rest of the fanfic. **_

_**And yes it will have some random moments just like the Hungary/Prussia fight, and it's definitely not really getting more serious. **_

_**Review please~**_


	3. Chapter 3

_**Chapter 3**_

"Waw" Everyone at table expressed at the first glance of the menu… well, everyone except England...

Unlike the others who seemed happy with the several types of foods on the menu, England wasn't this positive.

"How is this possible? This is a café! Café doesn't mean restaurant, morons!"He complained loudly, hoping that Spain and the others would get the point. But apparently it was hopeless, not even the people next to him seemed to understand his point.

"Iggy it's better like this! We have many choices. "The American said with his cheerful grin, hoping to bring a smile to Arthur's face…unfortunately, the other man's mouth didn't even move from an inch.

"So what will I choose aru…"China chimed, looking joyfully at the variety of food.

"Everything seems so good da?"

England looked at his three acquaintances with a serious look to realise that they were all happy talking about the different foods. He couldn't believe that he was apparently the only one who remarked that a café wasn't supposed to have such a menu.

Only a few minutes ago they were about to kill each other and now that everyone had a good choice of food, they seemed like civilized people.

_What in the world am I doing here? _

The British looked around and still felt insecure that none of his magical friends were there. Was it because of Russia's dark and cold aura? Or it was a sign that a horrible omen will come? Or even worse; probably both?

He couldn't be sure, but now he didn't have the choice but to "go with the flow". Arthur had a new plan; order, eat and get out of here the sooner possible. And this means even if America wouldn't have finished yet. After all, it was his idea so Alfred also had to suffer the consequences

"I will choose the hamburgers!" America screamed like a child eagerly, snapping England out of his thoughts.

"God, save the Queen! Hamburgers don't even come from Spain!" England pointed. He was hoping that someone would listen to him, but even with his complains, nobody seemed to pay attention.

"Please, don't tell me that I'm the only one who thinks it's a little weird." He added, waiting for, at least, an answer. Unfortunately, the answer he received wasn't the one he wanted.

"Please, can you shut up, da?"Russia demanded rudely, yet with a sweet and innocent tone.

England glared at the Russian, who only happily ignored it and turned his attention back to China.

"Hi, may I take your order…"A familiar feminine voice asked.

The four men looked at their waitress who seemed quite familiar to them.

"The waitress looks like Hungary!" Alfred came closer to England to whisper his discovery. He thought that it was such a coincidence.

"It's her, idiot!" The other confirmed.

"Oh." He said naively, but this was still a coincidence…right?

The brunette immediately froze and looked at all of them. After a while her notebook felt on the ground.

Since Hungary didn't say anything and was just gaping at them, the four allies didn't really know what to do, or at least, what to say about this weird comportment.

"Dudes, I think she had a stroke…"America told them.

He was ready to do what every hero would do when an innocent person would have a stroke. And by this, he meant taking his cell phone and calling an ambulance. However, before he could even took his cell phone out of his pocket, Elizabeta let a very girly and high pitched squeal that surprised all the four men.

"A-are you okay aru?" Yao finally asked, worried by the girl's behaviour.

"EKKKKK! I am better than okay!" She screamed while "fangirling".

"So why are you screaming like an insane woman da?"

Hungary answered to this by taking a camera from who knows where, her waitress outfit didn't even seem to have pockets.

She quickly took a picture of the four nations and it produced a very bright flash that blinded all of them.

"HAAA MY EYES!"

"It burns!"

They all quickly covered their eyes with their hands in order to protect it from the lights.

"What was that for?" England snapped angrily.

"Oops, the flash was way too strong." She said sheepishly, but with a too much happy tone to look like she was apologizing.

While the four allies were complaining about how the flash hurt their eyes and how they might never see well again, the Hungarian looked impatiently at the picture she just caught.

In her "own little world", the said photo seemed perfect; America's face was close to England's and Russia was sitting so close to China that it seemed like they were sharing a chair.

This was like her yaoi gold pot! She would never let this yaoi opportunity easily go away. It was only the first 5 minutes she was with them and she already had several ideas for a new doujinshi.

Upon hearing her fangirling once again, the allies were starting to get worried. Were they supposed to run away from the girl?

Not realising the anxious expression of the nations, Hungary quickly took once more her camera, but this time she wasn't rapid enough.

"Oh!No! She will rape our eyes again! Fast everyone hide your eyes!" The American warned.

In less than a second, all the four nations hid their face, and especially their eyes, behind the menu. This didn't amused Elizabeta at all.

"What is wrong with you?" She said, unhappy to have her yaoi inspiration took away.

"What is wrong with _you_? Why are you taking bloody pictures of us?" The British asked.

"Well to have a souvenir of this glorious moment?" Elizabeta answered with a big smile that didn't convince Arthur.

"Of what glorious moment?" Alfred inquired naively.

"Of _this_ glorious moment!"

They all looked at each other and didn't understand what in the world that woman was talking about.

"I don't see anything glorious here."

"Of course there is, you people are so naively cute. You finally decided to have a double date. Not to mention that you also finally decided to openly date in public." She stated referring to England.

"What? No! I'm not dating this guy!" Arthur snapped pointing at Alfred.

"Of course" Hungary chimed, giving him a wink. "And you two look so adorable." She added quickly to Russia and China, before the British could start to yell.

"Thank you!" The north nation giggled, quite happy with the compliment.

"Aiyaa we are not dating aru! I just came here to eat and then I'm going back home aru." Yao commented, frustrated by the remark. He quickly backed away from being close to the Russian, afraid that the brunette would continue to say idiocies about Ivan and him dating. Unfortunately, his argument was far from convincing the Hungarian.

"Hmmm, just by curiosity Russia, where are you going after the café?" She questioned to the taller man.

"Me? Ha, well I'm going back to Yao-Yao's house da?" Ivan openly revealed.

"Aiyaa what?" The Chinese replied shocked and embarrassed.

"Sure! Since you really want to go home, I can accept that we finish our date at your house da?" Ivan added bluntly.

Both China and Hungary screamed; while Yao it was because of embarrassment, Elizabeta was more because of excitement.

_I will have my yaoi inspiration, this I swear._ She promised mentally.

"Ha ha! China, you liar!" America laughed at Yao's complete embarrassed face.

"Aiyaa no! He will not! He will not!" The Chinese exclaimed trying to make a sentence that made sense."You will not come to my house after aru!" He finally replied to Russia.

"What? Why? It didn't bother you the other times da?" Ivan said disappointedly, not understanding the logic.

"The other times?" Hungary questioned curiously.

"That's not what you think aru!" China snapped, but nobody listened to him.

The Asian hid his face red from embarrassment with his long sleeves. Everyone, even England, was laughing at him. That wasn't fair!

"Stupid westerners with their shameful perverted mind aru!" Yao complained resentfully.

While China was sulking and whining about everyone's _rude_ comportment, Alfred, for his side, was happy to see Arthur smiling-or more like _smirking_- again.

"And you two, what are your plans after here?" The Hungarian quickly changed her attention to America, realising that Alfred was looking at his "date".

"I don't know. What do you want to do Iggy?"

"Oh, no. this isn't going to happen with me!" The British snorted at Hungary. He wasn't stupid, obviously she was about to do the same scheme she did with Russia and China.

'What are you talking about?" She lied, trying to look innocent. However it didn't work with England. She wouldn't get any information from him that easily.

"Aren't you our waitress? Aren't you supposed to take our orders and not chat?" Arthur cynically reminded her.

"Aiyaa, this is true aru. You only talked until now. You aren't doing your work perfectly aru." Yao, who finally stopped to complain, realised.

"Ha, I almost forgot about my hunger! I am starving!" America expressed loudly.

Elizabeta looked at the four nations who suddenly seemed really serious. If she didn't take their order soon, she would probably be in trouble…and trouble for her meant not having her yaoi opportunity anymore.

"Sure. What can I get for you?" She said, forcing a friendly tone.

"I'll start!" Alfred claimed the first place before anyone could. "I want hamburgers!"He said with a proud smile.

"Okay." Elizabeta quickly noted that on her notebook.

"And I also want French fries!" He added quickly.

"Do you want to have an entrée?"Hungary asked. Since the American seemed to starve to death, it wasn't a bad thing to take profit of it.

"Yes, I just said it…French fries..." America repeated, confused.

"Usually, an entrée is a salad or a soup." She pointed out plainly.

"Oh, my God! So you want to offer me a soup or a salad because I am a Hero?" He asked with a big grin, feeling so important and special.

"…yeah sure…if it helps you sleep better at night, you can believe that." The girl sighed.

"So what will I choose the soup or the salad?" America inquired.

It was such a difficult decision, both of them seemed equally good. He felt like his entire life would depend on such a little decision… who knows maybe it was the case? Therefore, Alfred decided that he better not take any chance and take all his time to make the right choice.

"I am choosing…. Errrrrrrrrr….."

Seeing that the "great hero" wasn't about to take a decision soon, Elizabeta decided to give him some time.

"Okay, so what are you guys taking?" She asked at the other three.

"I'm not sure yet aru." Yao answered undecided looking at his menu.

"That's okay; take your time my little sunflower da?" The Russian said with a sweet smile. England stared blankly at them in disbelieve, didn't China recently said that he was in a hurry?

"Sure take your time."Hungary gave them a cheerful smile. After all, why wouldn't she be happy, the more time they would stay there, the more chances of having yaoi ideas might come.

Unfortunately, her small moment of daydream ended when Russia gave her the menu, forcing the girl to take it.

"I want the brochette of chicken!"He declared, unlike the others, at least, he seemed sure of his choice.

"Yeah…" She responded uneasy by the Russian's weird behaviour. She will never get used to this man's comportment. Unsure of what to add more to this, the waitress finally turned her attention to England.

"And you?"

"I'm going to take a chicken salad." Arthur responded simply.

He thought it was a perfect order; it was small, so he wouldn't have to wait a long time for it, and it would fill his stomach until he get back home. However, some disagreed with his choice of food.

"WHAT? JUST A SALAD?" Alfred screamed completely forgetting about his big dilemma about the soup and the salad.

"Yes, just a salad." The British confirmed unsure of if he should be annoyed or surprised by the American's behaviour.

"How can you survive with just a salad, Iggy? Are you on diet?" America added, not believing that someone could endure an entire evening with only a salad.

"No. I am not on diet, you Git!"He confirmed bitterly. "There is nothing wrong with only eating a salad."

"You probably should choose something more expansive—errr I mean something that will fill your stomach."Hungary stated.

"A salad will perfectly fill my stomach. Thank you."

"Aiyaa, this will never fill your stomach aru! It's like eating nothing aru."Yao said meddling of what was obviously _**not**_ his business.

"Yao-Yao, I think that England is used to eat nothing, since his food is never edible da?"Russia pointed out.

"Hey!"England angrily snapped at Russia's remark.

"I can give you some time to think, my dear" Elizabeta replied amused by how things were going until now.

"B-But I have already decided! I'll take the chicken salad."

"No, he will not!" America shouted, but he rapidly received a death glare from the British.

"Come on, Iggy! You need to eat something better for you…oh! Maybe you should eat hamburgers."He proposed eagerly.

"Never!" Arthur seriously didn't understand how in the world this was better for him.

"Would you like to try our pasta, it's one of the greatest specialities from one of our chef today." Hungary suggested.

"I don't feel like it." This would take too much time, was it bad if he only choose a salad? Usually there weren't such food like pasta in cafés, if only the foolish people around him would realise that.

"Do you want to try the pasta, Yao-Yao?" Ivan proposed to the Chinese.

"I don't know aru…" China said still undecided.

"Are you sure you don't want any hamburgers, Iggy? They look so tasty."America remarked. Arthur really didn't understand what could look this delicious, since there weren't even pictures of the said food.

"What in the bloody world makes you say that?"

"Look the font is really pretty. Don't tell me it doesn't make you hungry." He explained, showing the fancy font of the writing at England and the others.

"Meh…I saw prettier da?" Russia said.

"Well you obviously don't have any good taste for fonts!"America replied back, anger to see someone not appreciating the beautiful and sophisticated font of the menu.

Arthur only answered to this by face palming.

"You know…I can come back!"Hungary finally proposed, noticing that none of them looked like they were about to complete their order soon.

"That would be a great idea aru."

"No!" Arthur shouted frustrated, shocking everyone.

"I decided that I want a salad and will get it! We always do that! We always argue on something and never agree and at the last minute, we decide to give up! But not today!"

The English man got up from his chair; which made Alfred have a little moment of panic, thinking that Arthur might go away. However instead, the British slammed the table with his fist and looked at each individual like if he was about to say the most important thing in the world.

"Today, I'm not getting out of this place without eating something first! I'm not suffering all you bloody wankers for nothing! I just want to order, eat and go home! So please, _please_ for the love of whatever you love in this bloody world, please order something fast!"He finished his last words with a hint of hidden despair.

There was an absolute moment of silence and everyone looked at the green eyed man who was gradually calming himself. England took the silence like a positive result of his speech and slowly sat back on the chair. Nobody said anything for a long while, until finally Russia decided to break the silence.

"So Yao-Yao, do you want to choose the brochettes like me da? I' m sure you are going to like it." He said completely ignoring the British's outburst.

"Hmm, but I don't feel like eating chicken aru." Yao answered, also ignoring the British's last speech.

"Arghhhh!"Arthur snapped his head against the table making a loud noise. "Why no one ever listens to me?" He whined against the table.

"So I'm going to come back to take the rest of the order."

Elizabeta, seeing that things weren't as much fun that they were at the beginning, quickly left them.

"No wait…"He desperately said, hoping that the Hungarian girl would have heard him, but she was already gone.

"AH, I have decided aru! I am going to choose the Spanish noodles. They seem delicious."China expressed with an expression of joy on his face exactly a second after Hungary left.

"Okay, so let's just wait for Hungary to return da?"

England cursed them under his breath. Seriously it seemed like they were doing on purpose to make him suffer. Why the world seemed to always be against him?

* * *

><p><em><strong>This was supposed to be a longer chapter, but I had to cut it in two chapters because it was really long. So it probably means that the next chapter will come sooner. It's also the reason, why the chapter ended up in a weird part, I thought it wasn't the best place to end it, but I didn't have the choice. So I will try to finish on the other one ASAP!<strong>_


	4. Chapter 4

_**Yes, this was the more ASAP that I could have done xP **_

_**Warning: In this chapter there are mentions of blood, but it's nothing serious or violent, it's just for the comedy. But I guess I should make a warning for that anyway.**_

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><p><em><strong>Chapter 4<strong>_

England glared at the communist in front of him, something that China was trying really hard to ignore until now by looking at the menu. However, now he couldn't take it anymore. Not only he was starting to be uncomfortable being observed like this, but also England's eyebrows were starting to actually scare him. What if it was some kind of curse or something?

"Aiyaa, What is wrong with you aru?" He asked unhappy.

"Thanks to you, I now have to wait I don't how long to be served again."Arthur commented bitterly at the Chinese.

"Don't put the blame on me. You're the one who didn't know what to choose aru." Yao replied with an annoyed tone.

England twitched his (GIANT!) eyebrow at the mention of this sentence.

First he knew what he wanted to choose, if only China didn't meddle of what wasn't his business, he would have been perfectly fine by ignoring America and he would have made his order already.

Second, the Asian was the one who was taking so much time deciding on what he wanted to have, making him waiting for them.

And lastly, but most importantly, wasn't China in a hurry? Didn't he specify he wanted to take a plane or something?

"Weren't you in a hurry? Don't you have a plane to miss?"The British asked sarcastically, trying very hard to not let his anger and impatience take over.

"Aiyaa, as long as I am here I'll have something good to eat. The food on the plane is always awful aru."The Chinese argued back.

England let a huge sigh and rubbed his head with his hands. For some reason since he entered in this place, his brain was hurting twice more. He was sure that it was a bad prediction, God wanted to warn him to get the hell out of this place. There were just so many signs.

"Iggy you really need to calm down and help me decide if I should get a soup or a salad."The American pointed out patting the other's back.

"Why are you all acting so much more stupid than usual today, really?"

"aww Iggy you can't choose?" Alfred said hoping to cheer up the British. "As the fabulous hero of the day, I will help you."

"I will pass; you always chose the food that has the most chances of giving you heart attacks."

"What that's not true! I never had a heart attack of my life."America replied offended.

"Go figure! I won't be surprised if in some years from now, you die because you eat too much unhealthy food, or because of you are too much overweight!"England grumbled.

Alfred didn't know how to answer to that, but the fact that Russia and China were laughing at him, didn't amused the American.

"Hey it's not true! And you two don't have the law to listen to our conversation, bunch of eavesdroppers!"

"We are not eavesdropping; you are just in front of us aru!"

"Just face it! They laugh because it's the true."Arthur remarked.

"Oh, yeah, well at least people don't get nausea, spasm, diarrhoea or instant brain coma when they eat my food."Alfred replied, unhappy about England's remark.

"What? What do you bloody mean by this?"

"I think you are just jealous, because they don't think it's save to give your food to the customers here! HA HA HA!" Alfred laughed at the British.

"Why would I be jealous of that? Obviously they don't have nice taste!"

"Being jealous is not nice, Iggy."America chimed childishly.

England couldn't take more of this supportive annoying scenario; it was his entire fault if he was there. So Arthur did what he would usually do in situations like this; strangle America. The American tried to stop the British but instead he was more gripping on his shirt than anything.

"Aiyaa, here they go again aru."China stated unsurprised. However, they started the first fight later than he would have thought.

"He he, I told you it will end up like this da? Now we only have to see who will kill whom first and throw the other one out. We will have the entire table to ourselves after that." Ivan said happy about his perfectly failed-proof plan.

"What? What kind of plan is that?" The two blond men screamed at the Russian.

"So that was what you were scheming you darn commies!"America said pointing the two other nations. "You wanted to get rid of us all along, bunch of bad Commies!"

"Kolkolkol, don't talk to me like this."Russia said not happy anymore. He quickly took his faucet pipe out of his coat and was prepared to hit them with it, but China quickly stopped him by gripping at his arm.

"Aiyaa, don't do that aru!" He yelled pulling Ivan's arm in order to not hit the others, but obviously Russia was way stronger than the grip.

"So have you decided or you need some time?"Hungary came unsurprised to see the men in the middle of a fight.

Though, she was very surprised to see the actual position all the men where in.

Due to America gripping England's shirt, the shirt was revealing Arthur's shoulder and with the position, it actually looked like America was undressing the British. On the other side of the table, China was gripping Russia by the waist and it reminded her so much of something else…

Was it bad if she actually liked all of this?

Everyone paused and looked at her when she came. Since she was gaping at them like earlier, they all thought that Elizabeta was about to fangirl again and blind them with her camera's flash, but she didn't. All the four allies were prepared to protect their eyes, but instead they saw the girl having a massive nosebleed and falling on the floor.

"AIyaa! She fainted aru!"

"Oh God is she still alive?"America questioned stepping back. It was okay if he was a little disgusted by all the blood, right? He was still manly, right?

"I don't know she is losing quite some blood."Arthur remarked. Even if the Hungarian fainted there was still blood running out of her nose. Was this even normal?

"Okay, don't worry! I'm calling the ambulance!"The American said, backing away from Hungary.

He took his cell phone to call the ambulance, but then he realised that he wasn't sure of the number to dial. He wasn't stupid, he knew that it was 9-1-1 in America, but was it the same here in Spain? At this moment he could only hear in his mind the conversation with his Boss telling him what to do in emergency cases outside of his country.

_You see America, if you have an emergency one day, you can just dial this number. Will you remember it, or do you want me to write it somewhere to remind you?_

_Pff it's okay sir, I will remember this number like if it was my own! _

And now, he remembered this entire scene but not the number!

"What are you doing idiot? Call the ambulance now!" England shouted, stressing out the American even more.

He looked at all of them with a despair expression on his face. What was he supposed to do? Was he supposed to risk the chance of being humiliated and ask the three other about the number he was supposed to call? Why people always put so much pressure on him?

"I-I don't know what to do!" He snapped, putting his hands on his face to hide the tears.

"What? But you just have to call the ambulance!"

"Aiyaa, her pulse his slowing down aru!" Yao commented panicking.

"Dear God! What are we suppose to do?" The British screamed, also starting to panic.

While China and England were panicking, and America crying like a little baby, Russia stayed there not expressing a single expression of worry. He thought it was really funny that everyone was panicking about this. Yet, deep down a small serious part of him found that it was sad that only some years ago, they were all in war together.

"I guess if she is missing air, someone should do CPR da?" Russia suggested, curious to see where things would get going.

"CPR?" The Chinese asked naively.

"Da, it should work."

There was an entire silence.

"Aiyaa do someone knows how to do CPR?"

"I-I know how…" England slowly said with no enthusiasm. He wasn't looking forward to this, but he wouldn't let someone die because of such a selfish reason. The British hesitantly came closer to the waitress and…

"IT'S OKAY! I'M FINE! I'M FINE!" Elizabeta shouted, quickly pushing the English man away from her. She quickly got up and fixed some of her outfit that still had a little blood. Arhur backed away, discontent of the girl's ungratefulness. He was about to save her life and she didn't even said a small "thank you".

"Y-You are okay aru?"China asked, confused to suddenly see Hungary in a great shape.

"A-Are you a zombie?"America stuttered horrified.

"Of course not! I'm really fine! It's not a big deal." The girl confirmed.

Thanks God, her brain was used to massive nosebleed or else she probably would have died before any of them would actually do something useful.

"Are you sure, you lost many blood aru." pointed said.

"Yes, I am perfect."

"Your skin is really white…"Alfred remarked, surprised to see that her skin complexion had changed that much. America thought that she looked like a zombie.

"Like I said; no big deal. So can I take the rest of your orders?"She asked like nothing awful ever happened.

Nobody answered, because they didn't know how to really react to that. The atmosphere was suddenly so different and anxious, and for once, it wasn't Russia's fault.

"Do you want still a minute?"She said, seeing that the four allies didn't talk.

"NO! It's okay we are going to order we are all ready!" England responded quickly afraid that the waitress might leave again. Every time Hungary came back something really strange happened. He didn't was another reason for this to happen again and fortunately for once, everyone agreed with him.

"I want the noodles aru."China slowly started.

"Perfect, who else has made their decisions?"

"Yes, I also have decided and I want…. a soup. No, a salad. No, a soup. No, a salad. No, a soup No, a salad. No, a soup. No, a …"

"Choose already!" The three yelled angrily at him.

"Okay okay, I will choose the soup! Salad is for those who need diets Ha Ha Ha."America joked, not understanding that it was probably not the best time to make jokes.

"That's why you need one."England muttered quietly to himself. Unknown to him, everyone else have heard his comment and even America.

"Hey!" The American said, feeling once again offended, mainly since the others started to laugh.

"And you England are you still on diet?"Hungary joked, looking at the British with a grin.

Arthur sighed, did he have any choice?

"I will take the steak with some wine." The British finally said.

"What?"Everyone shouted, surprised at the other man sudden change.

_What?_ England also asked to himself.

He didn't know why in the world he chose this dish-it looked like it would take an incredibly long time to make-but he did. And now it was a little too late, the Hungarian already noted that on her notebook…

"You changed quite fast." Alfred commented, still shocked.

"Yeah, got a problem with that?" He answered modestly, trying to look sure of his decision.

"No…"

"Who else wants something to drink?"

"I want vodka." Russia demanded.

"Humm, we don't have vodka. The only alcohol we have is wine…and we had beer before some _bastard_ decided to drink all of it…"She replied in rage, thinking of stupid Prussia who didn't listen to her and decided to drink all the bottles of beer.

"…but I think they sell some at the store just across the street" She added more calmly.

"And you are going to get some for me? Thank you~. You are way kinder and useful than you look da?"Russia said with a sweet smile.

"…yeah, sure…"She said with a forced tone, deep down she didn't have any intentions to go get the said drink.

"Aiyaa I'm not sure about what to choose like drink aru."China replied, looking at his menu again.

"Dear Lord, somebody _please_ take the menu away from him."England commented, clearly losing all his patience left.

"Aiyaa shut up! I didn't complain when you didn't know what to choose aru!" The Chinese replied, irritated by the other's rude commentary. However, the Russian next to him took the menu away from Yao and quickly gave it back to the waitress.

"Hey! Why did you do that aru?"Yao asked unhappy.

"That's okay Yao-Yao; I will offer you some of my vodka da? Hungary will bring a giant bottle." Russia assured, convinced that the brunette would really get the vodka from the store across the street.

"I don't even like Vodka aru!"China pointed.

"Your drinks and food are going to come soon, but first…"

The four men were preparing to protect their eyes once again…

"I have to say some news that I would like to share!"She said. Sadly, before she could continue, America ruined her moment.

"You are pregnant?"He questioned full of shock. Everyone at the table looked at the American and face palmed.

"…Why do I look fat?" The Hungarian asked, unsure of how to respond to that.

"No, well not that much. It's just that when a woman say that, I always think that it's about pregnancy! Ha Ha Ha!"Alfred explained innocently, not noticing that Elizabeta wasn't really sharing the same expression than him.

"What do you mean by "not that much"?"She shouted in rage.

"Yo, I-I didn't mean it like this dude!"The American replied nervous by the brunette's serious expression.

"So what did you meant?"She said, taking her frying pan out of nowhere.

"HAAAA!"

Alfred quickly got closer to Arthur for protection, hoping that at least one of them knew what the number for the ambulance was, because he would probably need it. Luckily, he was saved by Spain who came to take Hungary back to the kitchen.

"It's okay Hungary! You can take your break now. Go and rest."He suggested with a worried smile on his face. The girl didn't argument, but she silently gave a glare to America before going away.

"Your order will come soon." Spain assured them before heading back to the kitchen with the Hungarian.

"Crap, I don't think she is really happy with my comment." Alfred said, still holding England's arm to protect him.

"No? What makes you think that?" The British commented sarcastically.

"Why in the world did you say that to her?"

"I don't know, it just the first thing that came to mind!" He answered.

Everyone sighed, discouraged by the other's remark.

"Say, now that the drama as stopped; what is the number to call the ambulance?"America asked casually, forgetting about the recent event.

"You don't know the number?"

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><p><em><strong>By the way, the number to call a medical in Spain (and various other places in Europe) is 1-1-2. So if you ever travel there and have an emergency, try to call the 1-1-2 before the 9-1-1 xD.<strong>_

_**So even more of Hungary: the queen of yaoi. **_

_**I had a hard time figuring out what the allies would order. I didn't want them to tell their order plainly, I tried and I thought it was boring… So I made some research about Spanish dishes and food and even though they don't officially say it, each plate has a specific Spanish name (except America's xD).**_

_**Russia ordered Pinchitos**_

_**China ordered Fideuà**_

_**And England ordered Ropa vieja**_

_**I also thought it was really funny that in the first chapter, America told England they wouldn't eat hamburgers and the first thing he does when he saw the menu was to order hamburgers xD It's like a habit, it had to be this xP**_

_**Review Please, I forced myself to complete this today, even though I felt really depressed ;_; So if you can review, it would make me happy. Reading your comments make me smile every time =)**_


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